I’d trade the billions, too, Ted.

I just read this insanely depressing quote from Ted Turner (yes, *that* Ted Turner, the BILLIONAIRE). He’s describing his three marriages ending in divorce, after the article discusses Ted’s weekly rotating girlfriends (four in total):

Is he lonely? He pauses. “Maybe a little.”

Yep, what’s the point of the billions if you’re still lonely? And do four women who are happy to be away from you for three weeks in a row really seem likely to fill that void?

I’m sorry, Ted. I’m looking for a pretty sweet wife who never makes me feel lonely. I’ll keep looking. Maybe before I get to your age I’ll decide to settle for three out of four big characteristics, but I’m nowhere close to giving up on love. Surrender is not a Ranger word.